Her hot flashes rivaled any fire Satan could conjure and her mood swings often made her dizzy as they changed so swiftly. There was no need for her to venture out to a theme park. She had her own built in roller coaster ride called menopause. That bitch had been in full swing when she had been changed and apparently refused to leave. Add pregnancy to the mix, and you had a concoction the likes the supernatural world had never seen.
“You know, I wish I could undo what Spike did, but we have to wait for the baby to be born.” He leaned around and kissed her cheek.
“You are the one blessing in this entire mess.” The sisters, Fate, Chance, and Destiny, had touched her and Christoph, the king of the New Orleans vampire coven, and they were now what vampires considered destined mates. They loved each other and Christoph had the means to fix her screwed up conversion into a vampire, but not until the baby was born. It seemed she needed to retain some of her human side to bear this child. While she was grateful for her new life, there were times she wanted to throttle the three goddesses.
“So, what is on your agenda today?”
She turned in his embrace and looked into his beautiful gray eyes. “You mean after I eat my weight in bacon?”
Creases formed around his stormy gaze as he laughed. God, how she adored this vampire and contemplated shoving him back into their bedroom so she could strip him naked yet a second time this morning to have her horny way. Being a vampire upped her sex drive tenfold. Being pregnant upped it a hundred. She was on the verge of becoming a nymphomaniac.
“I see mischief in your heated gaze and would be more than happy to fuck you senseless again, but I have work to do.”
She let out a pouty sigh. “Always the voice of reason. I should go check on Fangri-La anyway and make sure Satan and his minions haven’t burned the place to the ground.” The B&B was an old plantation on the outskirts of town that Christoph had acquired some time ago. When they had met, he had asked her to turn it into a thriving business. While she had spruced the place up with some fresh paint and other interior help, the staff was still a work in progress.
“I’m sure the house still stands.”
“Then why did you just cringe?”
He looked offended and even shifted his weight. “I don’t cringe. I am the vampire king of New Orleans who has lived for over five hundred years and seen things that would twist your panties. Not once did I cringe.”
“My panties twist just looking at you. That is… when I’m wearing them.” She waggled her brows, and his gaze widened.
“Do not tempt me, female.”
“Fine.” She waddled like a duck with a lame foot back into the bedroom. “I also have an appointment to try on dresses later this morning, anyway.” She looked down at the round protrusion that kept her from seeing her feet. “I’m beginning to wish we had simply eloped.” Instead, they had allowed Satan to talk them into a big shindig that was to occur on Halloween and to top this mountain of shit with a fucking cherry. The king of dark, nasty things was throwing this party himself. He called it his gift to the new couple. Sabrina called it her worst nightmare.
“You are the one who agreed to allow Satan full authority over our wedding.”
She looked at her stunningly handsome mate and fought the urge to throw the closest object at his head. “You said we had no choice in the matter.” She gripped her belly as the baby played imaginary soccer inside her uterus. This child was way more active than Ruby had been, but then again, that had been nearly twenty-nine years ago so, what did she really remember? Thank goodness she was now a vampire, otherwise there was no way her fifty-four-year-old ass would survive this. As it was, she had spent months sicker than any human or vampire should ever be. It seemed carrying a vampire baby was not even in the same universe as carrying a human. Everything was amplified a million times. No wonder there were few vampires born. Every time she thought of doing this again, her eggs shriveled and turned to dust out of sheer terror.
“You could have argued a little more.”
“I swear I am going to throttle that twinkle right out of your eyes. And stop laughing!” She burst into a fit of giggles. Christoph always made her laugh. That is when he wasn’t making her horny.
He approached and slipped his arm around her thick waist. “Let me escort you to the dining room.” Opening the door to their apartment on the top floor of the compound, the scent of bacon reached her and made her stomach cry out in distress.
“I am starving!”
Her mate laughed and walked her to the elevator. “Well, we better hurry before they run out.”
She looked at him, certain horror was etched in the lines around her eyes and mouth. “Don’t even joke like that.”
Her stomach now happy as well as the baby who had finally stopped doing flips, Sabina climbed into the monstrosity that was now her mode of transport. Christoph had insisted on her driving a Lexus LX in black, of course. While the vehicle was luxury personified, she missed her Hell ride. The seats in this thing threatened to put her to sleep.
“Are you heading to Fangri-La this morning?”
She closed the door and lowered the window so she could talk to Jonas, who was Christoph’s right-hand man and now apparently hers as well.
“I am. And what are your plans for today? Banging my bestie?” She waggled her brows. Her friend Laura had confided going to a club where apparently you could suck and fuck, or in Laura’s case be sucked and fucked. Laura had been smitten by the man she had sex with, who they later discovered had been Jonas. Sabrina was now busy trying to play matchmaker.
One blond brow shot up. “I don’t bite and tell.”
“Hmm, of course not.” She would have to ask Laura later this morning when they were doing the dress thing. “Well, I’d best get going and see what kind of chaos Fangri-La is in.”
“Probably a smart idea. I understand Hazel is in charge today.”
Hazel was the resident succubus who was about as graceful as a giraffe wearing stilettos. Sabrina had at least made some headway in the way the female dressed. She prayed anyway. “Well, chat at ya later.” She wiggled her fingers in a little wave and pulled out of her spot in the parking garage.
Now on the highway, she cranked up the radio and jammed until she had made the thirty-minute drive to the once grand plantation that was now the hit B&B of the New Orleans supernaturals. Driving down the long lane lined by some of the oldest and creepiest oak trees she had ever seen, she had to wonder if any of them had ever had a swinging body dangle from their limbs.
“Jesus. I am morbid today.” She blamed it on her new life of being thrust into a world of vampires, a clumsy succubus who thought wearing duct tape was a fashion statement, and a reaper who liked to garden. Don’t get her started on the cute fluff-ball pooch who was really a hellhound and the other misfits she had grown rather fond of.
As the house came into view, she momentarily wondered if she had made a wrong turn somewhere because this couldn’t be the Fangri-La she had worked so hard on the last several months. The once creamy white exterior was now midnight black with blood red columns. She slammed on the brakes and shoved the SUV into park before she bailed… Well, more like rolled from the driver’s seat.
“What the ever-loving hell?” She yelled into the crisp breeze as she clutched her chest, wondering if vampires could have a heart attack. Meanwhile, Panic was wringing her hands as she threatened to make an entrance that was certain to have paramedics racing up the lane.
“You must be upset about the new paint job,” Hazel commented from the grand porch. When Sabrina finally moved her gaze to where the succubus stood, she nearly had a stroke.
“Are you people trying to kill me, or send me into early labor?” She clutched her belly, which currently looked like an alien was about to rip her open and emerge so it could feast on the flesh of man. For all she knew, the baby inside her causing her skin to ripple in ways that simply were not normal wanted to do just that.
Hazel moved to walk down the stairs, but when her right foot hit the second step, her ankle twisted and down she went. Tumbling like a blonde demonic weed of arms, legs and… Holy mother of sacred things, had Hazel just flashed her coochie at the world? Sabrina wrapped an arm around her protruding belly as best she could and jogged toward the house. Rather, it was more like she was attempting––and poorly––to run a tire course. The sight of a demon in a heap on the ground with her va-jay-jay sunning itself and a very pregnant vampire trying to run must have been a hysterical scene, because male laughter erupted and filled the air.
Hazel had managed herself back to her feet by the time Sabrina arrived because the fact was, she was no speedy vampire. Christoph, Jonas and the others in the coven might be able to run past a person so fast they were nothing more than a flash of shadows, but not her. She couldn’t even manage a fast waddle at this point. Hell, penguins moved faster than she did.
“Are you alright?” She asked through ragged breaths. Yes, not even being a vampire kept her from getting winded occasionally. This child was sucking the life out of her, but she loved the babe, anyway.
“Yes.” Hazel pulled a leaf from her hair.
“Good. Now, if you would wear proper clothing, you might not flash the guests. What the hell is that getup, anyway?” She stared at the demon, who was wrapped in something akin to plastic wrap and glitter. On her feet were a pair of pink Chuck Taylors. Only Hazel could trip while wearing tennis shoes.
“It’s my latest creation. You like?” She asked, pushing her blonde strands off her shoulders.
“No. I do not like. Well, the shoes are fine, but did you forget everything I taught you?”
Hazel pushed out an overly glossed pink lip and sighed. “I’ll change.” Then spun and headed back up the stairs while Sabrina held her breath. The succubus managed to get back into the house without incident. Thank Satan!
“She is a hot mess, that one.”
Sabrina turned to look at Satan, who stood beside her in tattered jeans and a very well fitted black tee. Shit on a stick! “Can you turn off that devilish sex appeal of yours?”
His laughter was deep, dark, and sexy. “I’m afraid it doesn’t come with a switch.”
Libido shivered, and she wished Christoph was here to snuff out her burning desires. “Such a shame. Now, why is Fangri-La painted black?” She focused back on the once brilliant home that currently looked like something from a horror flick.
“It’s Hallows Eve soon, and this place needs to be perfect for your wedding.”
“It was perfect!” She wanted to cry while eating a gallon of caramel crunch ice cream loaded with toffee bites.
“Oh, stop worrying your pretty head off. I will change it back once the festivities are over.” He clapped his hands together and rubbed. “Wait until you see the decorations.”
She was scared. Where was that damn ice cream?